Call Me Definitely

John being a decoy while I try to take a picture of the gathering crowd.

 My friend, Sarah*, invited John and I to join her and her husband at McDonald's one Saturday morning to meet a local friend who might be able to help us with language study.  We readily agreed and began our walk from our apartment to the other side of town.

It was the day before a big national holiday (sort of like our July 4th) and scores of people were out to celebrate.  We passed through the gauntlet of felucca (sailboat) captains greeting them and eventually making our way to the restaurant.  Once there, however, we had to stop just shy of the entrance.

There were many people gathered in and around the area.  Because of the current political scene, we try to see exactly what's happening first before voluntarily entering the fray.  Once we heard some drums playing we realized the collected group was also celebrating the holiday.

We went to the edge of the Nile where there are outdoor seats.  We greeted Sarah and her husband.  She said that her friend had not shown up yet so we decided to wait outside and watch the festivities.  Boats from all directions were coming into the harbor carrying men dressed in their best jalibayas (long tunic with pants) and women in their sparkling finery.  Different groups wore different colors and had their own dance that they would perform on the top deck of the boats.

As the boats began to dock, the celebrators would disembark and make their way toward us and on up to the street.  It was sort of like a parade except on the water.

We had waited for over 30 minutes now and wondered what we should do next.  Sarah called her friend but received no answer.  This creates a dilemma.  Lateness in this culture is not a problem and is to be expected.  How long to wait is where it gets tricky.  If you're American through and through then 15-30 minutes is an extremely long time to wait on someone.  But we're in their culture…so we have to add 30-60 minutes give or take.

We decided to order lunch and just settle in for the long haul.  We ate and visited all the while placing calls to our missing friend.  Finally, after an hour and a half we decided it was an official "no show."

This explains the phone calls that we receive prior to a visit to a local friend's home.  They will ask us to come to their home for tea.  We ask what day and time.  They tell us.  We agree.  After we return to our home, we will receive another call confirming that we're coming.  Yes, still coming.

Two days before the visit, we may receive yet another call to remind us that we had said we're coming.  We try to really, really emphasize that we will come.

The day before, we might receive 1 or 2 calls politely asking if we will be able to come.  By now, I want to say, "YES! YES! A THOUSAND TIMES YES!  WE ARE COMING! I HAVE IT IN MY CALENDAR, ON MY PHONE, TACKED TO MY FRIDGE AND TATTOOED ON MY CAT!"  But (that wouldn't be very nice so...) instead I calmly confirm that it would be our pleasure to join them.

On the actual day, we receive one more call 15 minutes prior to our agreed upon meeting time once again confirming that we are indeed on our way.

You would think that after we have told them 6 times that we were coming that they would have all things ready.  Not always true.  We run about 50% in this category.  50% have tea and cakes ready for us while the other 50% may make a family member run to the store to pick up a few things while the rest chat with us.  (This means that you should add another 2 hours to the visit for cooking time.)

So when friends sometimes ask us, "What do you do during the day?"  I smile and say, "I answer calls and wait for friends."  

*Not her real name

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