A Nubian Wedding

One of the first friends that we made here in our fair city warmly welcomed us back from our time in the US.  He asked how everyone (and I mean everyone) in our family was doing followed by an invitation to his brother's wedding.  He had mentioned it before our travels so we knew he might be serious.

He told us to be ready at 9:30 on Thursday night.  The day he invited us was Monday.  That is incredible lead time in this culture.  

Thursday arrived and we had had a lot of activity going on.  Different people had dropped in, John had been doing home repairs (as always) and the heat had reached a new high of 118º.  Aria and I had finished washing the dishes and sat down for a cool down break.  John joined us and we all concluded that we were exhausted.  Then we remembered the wedding.  

For those of you who know John, you remember that he turns into a pumpkin around 10 pm.  But he begins turning shades of orange around 9:30 pm.  We wondered out loud, "I wonder if Mahdi* really meant the invitation." and "Do you think he really means 9:30 pm?"

We pondered and then went about our business.  We hadn't heard from him since our meeting on Monday.  Hanshoof. ("We will see.")

At 9:40 pm, we heard a knock at the door.  Mahdi had arrived and would walk us to the wedding.  Aria and I flew up and began flinging on wedding-appropriate clothing.  We grabbed anything and everything that sparkled.  Five minutes later we dashed out the door and headed toward the big event.

Mahdi took us to a home on the other side of our village.  The door was open so he gestured for us to walk through.  When we did, we saw a room full of men's eyes all staring back at us.  Aria and I immediately backed out.  Mahdi said, "It's okay.  It's okay."

Actually, no it's not.  We can't be in the same room with the men.  He nodded and told us to follow him.  He took us up the stairs to a group of women all hustling around in the kitchen.  They looked up a bit shocked at their guests and then went about their business.

Mahdi took us to a room that had 2 beds, a TV and a refrigerator.  He told us to sit.  We complied.

He returned with John to the room full of men and left us on our own.

We had been in this scenario MANY times before but it is always a bit unnerving wondering what would happen next.

An older woman came in and sat down on the bed opposite us.  We greeted her and she smiled.  She then turned her attention to the TV in which an Egyptian soap opera was on.  We didn't know what else to do so we joined her.

Another woman entered carrying a large tray of food.  She smiled at us and told us to eat.  We began nibbling and offered food to the woman across from us.  She had already eaten, but insisted we go on without her.

Word had now spread that foreigners were in the house.  Children began running through to catch their own glimpse of the excitement.  We smiled and said hello.  They giggled and pushed each other forward to shake hands.

One boy about 5 years old walked in with another who looked to be about 7.  The 7 year old said, "My brother has a question.  Will you marry him?"

I smiled and told him regrettably I would have to decline because I was already married.  They laughed and ran away.

This continued for a couple hours.  It was nearing midnight and every once in a while Aria or I would ask, "So do you think the bride and groom will arrive soon?"  Lissa…lissa.  ("Not yet.  Not yet.")  One lady (totally bedazzled) came in and chatted a bit.  She told us that the bride must first go to the hair stylist along with all the bridesmaids.  Then they meet the groom at the photography studio and have their photos taken.  This process last several hours.

After the photos, the bride, groom and entourage drive around town honking their horns and making their way to the place of the ceremony.

Meanwhile back at the house:  Aria and I have eaten and met around 864 children.

We walked out on the balcony and spotted John sitting in a row of chairs with some other men.  We made eye contact and he joined us at the bottom of the stairs.  He asked if we were all right and we assured him we were.

Mahdi then saw us together and told us to go into another side room.  2 padded benches and a small freezer were in it.  We sat down and Mahdi offered us tea.  Aria and John declined, not wanting to have special treatment but I nodded yes because I had failed to take a nap in the afternoon.  I could barely keep my eyes open.

Soon the children found us and Aria became the rock star of the wedding.  Girls of every age began scooting around her to find out her name, where she was from and if she could dance.  She attempted to answer their questions and keep them entertained for another couple hours.  

At 2:00 am, John went outside and sat next to a man who was also waiting.  He struck up a conversation and was again told "Lissa."  Aria sneaked a peek at what was happening.  A band had arrived and was playing prelude music.  The young girls surrounding Aria now really wanted Aria to get up and dance.  She did a couple moves, but they wanted her to do more.  She politely declined and they began showing her how to shake her shoulders the Nubian way.

We laughed and clapped.  At around 2:30 am, Aria and I were finished.  I simply could not go any more.  We had been on full Arabic speaking alert for 5 hours.  It was way past the time I normally go to bed.  There was no indicator that the bride and groom were coming any time soon.  I found John and told him that we couldn't hold out any longer.

He understood and said that he would stay to represent the family.  I thanked him profusely.  He returned to his seat while Aria and I tried to find our way out of the village.  The streets are dirt and they are little more than paths.  At night, it becomes nothing short of a labyrinth.  A man saw our plight and offered to lead us out.  However, he first led us to his mother in which we were to have tea.

We thanked him but said that we really must be going.  We reached a couple deadends before another man took pity on us and led us back to a street we recognized.  As we were cresting the main road, a long line of cars honked their way toward us.  The bride and groom cometh!  We were able to see the decorated cars and wish them the best at least in our minds.

John says that right after we left, the wedding party arrived and things got really lively.  The bride and groom's families signed the legal document declaring them husband and wife.  The music struck up and the party really started.

Some junior high-aged boys had purchased Roman candles for the occasion.  One boy lit his and began shooting them above the crowd's heads.  Mahdi saw the boy and was furious.  He jerked the Roman candle out of his hand and began yelling at the boy.  The problem was that the Roman candle hadn't finished.  Soon rockets of color were now shooting into the crowd and the panicked people began running in all directions.

John said it was quite a sight.

He arrived home around 4:30 am.  Needless to say, we slept in the next morning.

Our Nubian friends had welcomed us into their lives and we were privileged to be a part.  We were the only foreigners and definitely the only Christians present.  What a gift!

Next time, however, we promised ourselves we WILL take a nap ahead of time and learn some new dance moves.