Oh, Mango!

Last summer with Aria and our wonderful friend (and mangoes).

Right after I was basking in the bliss of life here, I indulged in a mango that had been just-picked by one of our dearest friends, Ahmed*. His family has an orchard on a nearby island and the mangoes were ripe for the pickin’. 

Amazing mangoes

Last summer, Ahmed brought these same mangoes to us so John and I promptly indulged ourselves with multiple helpings. That is until the next day when I swelled up and couldn’t see out of my left eye. After some research, I discovered that mangoes have the same oil on their skin as poison ivy. BEFORE I knew that, I had cut the mangoes, wiped my brow from sweat, handled the mangoes some more and KAPOW! That was 10 days of Rocky Balboa-esque appearance that I didn’t care to repeat. 

Mangoes for sale everywhere.

This time, John handled the mangoes (no affect on him…not sure why) and I ate them. However, one day he was busy, I was hungry so I approached the mango extraction like a neurosurgeon. I had knives, towels, cutting boards…everything necessary to keep all mango oil away from me. I scrubbed my face and hands afterward and then ate the mango. 24 hours later…no effect. Sweeeeeeet!
The next day I did the same. It was on the third day that I realized I had been delusional. I could not beat the mangoes, but rather it looked as though the mangoes had beaten me. I was completely swollen shut, red and itching. So attractive.

I looked at John and all he could say was, “You poor thing.” That was his mantra as he tried to find any form of relief for me over the last 5 days. 

This was early in the reaction,
but I'm too vain to post more.

I have to accept that mangoes are not my friend. At least this variety. Sadness. There really isn’t anything better than a perfectly ripened mango from Africa. 

Today I am up and about again ready to face the public. The swelling has receded and my facial features have shifted back into place.

It’s Ramadan so we want to be out in the village visiting our friends in the evening…my appearance last week would not have brought the feeling of good tidings to them. So now I’ll bake over the next couple days and spend time with our neighbors as they continue into the second week of a 30-day fast. However, mangoes will not be on the menu. 

___________________

*Not his real name.

Feeling much better now!

I'm Glad to Be Here

Lights and Lanterns are used for
decoration during Ramadan.

It’s been a while since I’ve written and there’s good reason. Long ago, when I began blogging I made an internal rule that I would not, WOULD NOT post things when taking medication. I broke that rule a couple times which turned out not to be a good choice. So I stuck to it this time and now I am breaking my silence. I know you’re on pins and needles.

Our formal wear...

Speaking of needles, I recently was in the hospital for surgery. What kind of surgery you ask? Sorry. I just can’t type about my internal organs publicly. I’m happy to dialogue privately if you’re interested. (I even have printouts!)

Now I am in the convalescing stage and am doing quite well. So well that I don’t need any further narcotics and thus today’s post. 

It’s Day 7 of Ramadan in the Muslim world and we are reminded once again what a difficult requirement this is of those who follow Islam. No water, food or any other vice from sunup to sundown. Here that has been around 14 hours of sunlight and the temps have been consistently over 100 every day. It’s brutal, but the dear people in our village are sincere, devout. 

This is a small meal!

As we were greeting our neighbors this evening, they welcomed us warmly and continued on to the mosque where they recite portions of the Qu’ran every night of Ramadan. Allah weighs good and bad deeds and the things done in devotion to Islam during Ramadan bear more weight. 

I baked cupcakes today and will distribute them tomorrow to our friends along with a prayer of blessing. They really, really like the Hershey’s Perfect Chocolate Cake recipe. So I make it every time. 

After mosque, many will return home with family and watch the special TV programs that are aired during this season. A-List movies from America, series such as “24”, “The Unit” and “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” are all quite popular. They also enjoy soap operas that are produced in-country just for Ramadan.

The work schedules for many people are adjusted. Everyone will eat one last meal at 2:30 am and then sleep until around 11 am. Many will then go to work and stay until 6 pm. Then they return home to be ready to eat at sunset which is signified by the blasting of a cannon and calls from all the mosques.

Sunset is signified by the sound of a cannon
and from loudspeakers at mosques.

It’s a time of abundance as families will spend far more than they usually do to create lavish meals each evening. It’s a bucketload of work, too! Imagine having 20 extremely hungry people at your table every night. Yikes! Waltons times 2 and they didn’t have to try to make those rolled up grape leaves thingies.

We are grateful to be here. Yes, I actually said that. It’s difficult trying to plan our day when so many things are closed or when shopping for certain items means going at 10 pm. All of society’s schedule changes for an entire month! And the use of firecrackers at all hours of the night is encouraged. But it’s good to be with our friends, to speak to them of grace, peace and Jesus. How else would different ideas be introduced except through spending time together, building trust and sharing life?

The cloth is called "Ramadan Cloth"
used to decorate during this season.

So thanks for checking in with me. I’m glad to be lucid again. I’m glad to be in your life. I’m glad to be here.
_____________________

PS I’m currently doing a series of photos and Ramadan facts on Instagram (paminthesand), Twitter (@paminthesand) and FB in case you’d like to learn a few more details about it. Look me up! Let’s be social media pals!

Hafla Kabeera (Big Party)

Some fun after the workshop.
Out of respect, we blurred their faces.

I’m on what I call a “Union Break.” This means that I have completed a list of tasks that I had set for myself and am now sitting directly under the A/C in our bedroom cooling down with an iced beverage. (I’ll let you guess what that might be.)

Annnnnnyway, it’s been quite the week. Tuesday we concluded a training session with teachers in a village across the Nile. They liked it so much that they asked us to start a different workshop next Tuesday. So…here we go. But inbetween they invited us to come to their Kindergarten Graduation and Party on Thursday night. Of course, we agreed. We love hanging out with them in these special moments.

Adorable.

Two of our Egyptian friends picked us up and we headed to the ceremony arriving at around 8:15 pm. Yes, you read that right. And guess what? We were early! The graduation was being held in the “Association Building” which looked like it could hold 300 people in chairs and hundreds of others along the sides and hanging off of the second tier. 

As soon as we walked into the sea of people, the “waters” began to part and all eyes were turned on us. I try to keep myself calm in these moments and say inwardly, “Smile and wave, Pam. Smile and wave.”  We tried to stand along the sides to wait for the festivities to begin, but the teachers there would have none of it. The headmistress greeted us and ordered 4 chairs be brought out and put in the front row. We thanked her and then asked if we could move them to the side so that the mothers who had shown up early for good seats would not actually follow through with the murder in their eyes. (Mothers of preschoolers with video cameras are the same everywhere…DON’T BLOCK MY VIEW OF WOO-WOO!) The headmistress obliged and we exhaled.

This is the Paparazzi crowd...

Some came to greet us, but many of the mothers were giving their children the final primping before sending them up on stage. The headmistress returned with a small fold up table which she placed in front of our chairs. She smiled as she saw the puzzled looks on our faces. Next came another woman who had a satin tablecloth. After she put that down, still another woman arrived with 2 trays of sweets and drinks. 

Now we are in social purgatory. They brought us their very best cakes and even put it on China. They expect us to start eating…which wouldn’t be a bad thing except that there are around 200 pairs of eyes looking at the cake and then at us…then back at the cake. The rest of the crowd doesn’t get their celebratory cake until after the program. What to do? What to do?

Our Egyptian friend who is a beautiful woman and great friend of the villagers picked up the plate, shrugged and started eating. We laughed as we said how good we had been on our diet up until now.

Oh, the Sugar Humanity!

The program finally started complete with special lighting and DJ. The principal of the school opened with a reading from the Q’ran and a blessing. The adorable kindergartners then came up in groups of 2 and 3 to recite various poems, songs and portions of the Q’ran. The DJ believed that our village across the river needed to hear the program too so he had all speakers at full capacity. My ears are still ringing.

After the recitations, a cartoon character named Karumbo came to greet the children and presented them each with a gift. He then stood with the children holding their kindergarten graduation certificates. They looked adorable in their miniature caps and gowns.

This is Karumbo. Now you know.

The headmistress then presented gifts to each of the teachers and the parents clapped in appreciation. As I looked around the courtyard, I surmised that we might have broken a village record for most bodies in a confined location…but no one seemed to care.

Our friend gave us the nod and told us that it was time for us to go. She explained later that the party would continue until 1 or 2 am in the morning and that she had another meeting to attend. As we departed, some of the teachers from our workshop hugged us and told us that they would see us next week. I smiled and told them I would see them then. One said in her best English, “I. will. see. you. later. Teacher!” She was very deliberate, but she got it just right. I responded in Arabic and she laughed. (I hope that was a good laugh.)

After a slow start to our morning, we kicked into gear today to prepare for some college guys coming our way tomorrow. For John, that means organizing a schedule, arranging transport, locating housing.  For me, it means to cook lots and lots of food and keep it coming. So far I’ve made African Curry, prepared the toppings, brownies, pumpkin bread, banana chocolate chip muffins, washed and cut up the vegetables, prepared the fruit, made the welcome baskets and realized I forgot about 5 things that I’ll need to pick up before noon tomorrow. Whew! 

This guy was just too cute.

We love company, but we have to pace ourselves and our guests during the summer months. You can fry your brain pretty quickly here in the desert before you even know what’s happening. That’s why our local friends hold all their events at night. Smart. Still there are some things here best seen during the day, so we’ll do our best to keep all visiting friends hydrated thus preventing camel-jerky syndrome. (I just made this up but you can imagine.)

You may not hear from us for a few days. We’ll want to give our guests our full attention. Thanks for visiting with me during my break. Now onto my next glamorous task…(drumroll)…UNDERWEAR FOLDING! Well…maybe one more refill.

Village People

I know from the title of the post that you’ll now be humming “THE SONG” through the rest of the reading. Sorry. Not sorry. :)

Tonight marks the third and final session of the teacher training workshop that John and I have been teaching in a Nubian village just across the river (The Nile, that is). It’s been a good group. We’ve averaged 12-15 women who are teachers and moms interested in building foundations for reading among young children. To put it in their words, “How to Teach A, B, Cs.”

We are holding the workshop inside the village elementary school. The room we’re using has a side that is open to the elements. We knew that we would be teaching in a variety of locations and environments so when we purchased our projector we tried to think through all the scenarios. Will it be bright enough to show up in daylight? Is it small enough to transport? Does the bulb cost a fortune to replace? One question we DIDN’T think to ask is, “If the temp is 110º what will happen to the projector?” Well, the answer is that as soon as you turn it on it will flash “overheating.” No joke. Now we’re trying to think of a way to keep it cool while not electrocuting ourselves…We’ll keep you posted. Any of you engineering types that have a quick answer…send it. Help a sister out!

Twinkies, water  and juice boxes for us on a silver tray!

The first session only 2 women were present when we arrived. Once we were there and they actually believed we were coming, one got on her cellphone and began calling the others. Soon they arrived and we were able to start reasonably on time. The second session we arrived and the group was already there sitting on the benches waiting for us. (That brings joy to ANY teacher’s heart!)

This last session is really a 2-parter. Tonight we will finish up the concepts we have to present followed by a variety of learning activities where we will all participate together. Then on Thursday they’ve invited us back for the End of School Year Village Party. All the families from the village will be there to celebrate. It’s quite an honor and one we’ll gladly attend.

I’ve even been invited to the engagement party of one of the teachers, but that doesn’t happen until October. However, she made me promise that I’d come. They are a fun group and when I visit with them during breaks they tell me about their lives, their families. We even joked together as they asked if I had any sons they could meet. 

It’s a privilege to be included and we take every opportunity seriously. Open doors come and go. We want to make the most of the time while we have it. Speaking of… we are currently talking with some Desert Sands* headmasters who have agreed to come to our location for a training conference. Please pray with us that all the details and logistics would come together. This is a first step in testing the waters for our return to Desert Sands. So we seize the moments we have now with those the Lord puts in our path here and also continue to walk in faith believing for those in Desert Sands.

Sing with me, "It's fun to teach all the A---B---C---Ds!" (To the tune of "YMCA", of course!)

*Send me your email if you would like to hear more about Desert Sands...

Our local friend helping us with translation...
Educational terms are difficult in any language!

Gomer in the Big City

Shazam!

We are in Cairo this week and I'm thrilled to be back in the big city. Since this was the first place we ever lived abroad as a family, it will always hold a special place in my heart...and ears...and lungs. Cairo is known as "The City of a Thousand Minarets" but in truth there are many more. Horns are the second major language spoken here and certain days the smog will only allow you to view 1 of the 3 pyramids even up close. Still it's endearing...

We've been meeting up with some friends, doing some shopping and eating at the innumerable amazing restaurants available.  I experienced a bit of culture shock from our small city living when I sat down at a French pastry restaurant and looked at the menu. I just couldn't get over the options. It was a happy conundrum.

Every meeting location requires thought and process...How far away is it? What time of day is it? How heavy is the traffic?

One appointment we had was an hour away by taxi when the traffic was lightest...Still it's the way of the city. Sometimes we take the subway and I'm reminded of the endless trips the girls took on it as 15 and 17 year olds going to their Arabic classes. They were and are very brave, independent souls. (That was pre-Revolution and security was different then.)

We tried to go to the U.S. Embassy but new rules have been put into effect and we may not get in this trip. Sigh.

Our Egyptian friends are simply some of our favorite people in the world and they always welcome us with open hearts.

So it's a good week. We're grateful for a chance to see friends, stock up on some supplies and take in big city offerings.

Still our quiet village calls to us with big smiles and warm greetings. We return to a culture that insists that tea time is priority and afternoon naps a necessity. Ah, yes...

__________________________________________________

The Price Is Right!

Celebrating 28 years of wedded bliss at Chili's.

Why would you NOT want to be the center of style?

Um...Are we still in Egypt?

Dancing Waters Show

Hibiscus Tea Guy for Commuters

Geometric Mosque

With some of our dear friends...

Cougar Cruises

A previous visit to our city in 2009

A few times I have likened life on this side of the pond as being like one who’s landed on Mars and is trying to see if the atmospheric pressure will provide sustainable life. In so many ways this place is just different from anything I’ve ever known., i.e. the food, the weather, the language, the clothes, the RELATIONSHIPS.

Wow. Relationships are complicated here. Now granted there are no known Egyptian versions of the Kardashians or shows like, “The Real Housewives of Cairo,” but there are situations I find myself in that I never saw coming…or understood once they did.

Most of the time John walks with me when we have errands to do in town but on some days when I’m meeting a friend or have a meeting, I walk alone. Now our city is around half a million people, but it doesn’t feel like it. We live in a nearby village, but even “town” still feels pretty small and safe. I enjoy the exercise especially when the temps are under 100º. (This will not happen again until September.)

Horse and Buggy Ride!

Something I did notice during some of these first solo walks were comments that the men would make as I would walk by. Some men sit alongside the Nile “boardwalk” as it were and try to gain customers for their sailboats or horse carriages. Others are there to visit with their friends. And the remaining ones hang out because they simply don’t have any other place to be.

The comments range from “Hello, whassyourname?” to “Felucca?” (Sailboat?) or “Hola, Amiga!” One of my favorites is “Welcome to Alaska!” (a particularly witty comment when it’s 120º).

A few have crossed the line, however, and go from shouting their questions to walking alongside me. “Whassyourname? Where are you from? You are fanTAStic! You want to be my second wife?”

Egypt 2009

To these questions, I give no answer. I simply put my head down and pick up the pace. When this first happened I was shocked. You see, when we lived in Cairo we had comments and camel offers pouring in constantly because of our two daughters. I didn’t like it, but we learned to deal with it.


In Sudan, we still had ongoing “negotiation-rejections” for the girls now and then, but my role as mother was understood. I was “old” and “used up” to put it in their vernacular. It was the nicest thing anyone had ever said to me. When the girls went to college, the remarks stopped. The pressure was off.

Sudan 2010

Now here in Upper Egypt, I was once again being assailed with comments and offers. What gives?! So exasperated from my experience I asked our local friends about it. They laughed. One said, “You can never be too old here!” Still another reminded me that Muslim men can have up to four wives and I should take it as a compliment.

I still couldn’t remove the dissonance in my brain over this issue. Finally, one friend said, “It’s because of the cruises.”

“Cruises?”

Fun on a NON-cougar cruise.

“Yes, the cruises. Boats come from the cities in the north with foreign women on them who travel alone. When they stop in the port, young Egyptian men will strike up a friendship with them. The lonely woman has then been known to invite the young man on board for the rest of the cruise during which she will pay his way, buy new clothes for him and give him some cash. At the end of the trip they part. She returns to her country and he looks for another boat.”

My jaw is on the floor.

“The women that are usually on these cruise ships are retired women in their 60s, 70s and even 80s. So you see, there is no age limit for potential companionship here.”

I’m stunned. I mean I understand that things like this exist, but this is the first time that it has been this close, this personal.

The cruise ship port

Sometimes to keep things on the “up and up” in the Muslim context the woman will “marry” the man temporarily. The contract will then be torn up at the end of the vacation. It’s also happened that some women will just remain married to these men and return periodically for visits. The man will also usually have at least one wife with children from his local tribe. 

John making new friends.

It’s considered an acceptable business practice here. Marriage is not viewed as a covenantal relationship. It’s a negotiation between families or in this case between perceived needs and wants. He wants cash, a green card and maybe a way out. She wants…well, you know what she wants.

Some might consider this topic too indelicate to discuss. I would agree except that it is part of my every day life. I have no choice but to face it and try to work this out in my brain and spirit.

Of course this doesn’t represent all of the men here or all of the marriages. We know some wonderful families who demonstrate love and respect to one another very well. Still it's a real part of this society and therefore something that I have to know about which turns my reluctant understanding into prayer for these dear people.

As for me, I still take walks and enjoy meeting people…but I steer clear of anyone who might be heading my way humming the theme from “The Love Boat.”

I guess I am all that AND a bag of chips.
(Bad joke.)

I Want to Hear What You're Saying, Honey, But I've Got Toilet Paper in My Ears!

Today’s original blog has long been delayed and it will continue to be for a couple days more. I am planning to write about a unique phenomenon here called, “Cougar Cruises,” but not yet. Intrigued? Rather I am going to just update you on life here. 

Last week, the To-Do List that I created was a thing of beauty. I had open slots in my calendar and everything needing to be done was fitting nicely into these blank spaces. Yes! I could see light at the end of the tunnel!

But alas it was not to be. I began getting a slight earache which isn’t really unusual. I have thin tympanums and it’s been part of my life for as long as I can remember. (I am a bit bitter that if I’m going to have THIN anything…Why thin tympanums and not thighs? Sigh.)

The small twinge turned into a two-alarm double ear infection which left me clutching the sides of my head and yelling (unintentionally) at John, “I WANT TO HEAR WHAT YOUR SAYING, HONEY, BUT I HAVE TOILET PAPER STUCK IN MY EARS!” Ah, yes. THIS is what marital commitment is made of. The toilet paper was keeping the medicine in my ears leaving me with quite an attractive overall look that John has gotten to live with for the last 3 days.

Just as the ears were beginning to heal and sounds around me were returning, I was hit with stomach flu which has laid me out flat with the exception of my head leaning near a trashcan. Unbelievable.

I have a Fin, a Latin, a German and an American coming to dinner tonight…That sounds like the start of an amazing joke, but it’s the truth. I need to recover fast and that includes being able to actually look at food without running for the porcelain areas of the house.

So that’s my week so far. How’s yours? Please speak up when you answer and don’t use any food analogies. Thank you and much love.