Monday Mornings of the Soul

Local art

It's lunchtime here and I have made several long sighing noises since this morning.  Yes, it's Monday and we could all commiserate on our feelings about this day…but it feels like more than that.  It's a deep sigh of the soul that's too tired to crawl out of bed, look at the next 24 hours and say, "Here I am!  Bring it!"

Part of it is simply the season we're in.  Learning a language is hard…Let me rephrase that.  Learning how to move in and out of culture without epic scenes of humiliation is hard…and humbling.  You begin to measure your success by the number of decreasing failures.  Not exactly the greatest incentive program.

Another reason in part is the nebulousness (Is that even a word?) of our future.  Will S*dan open again?  If so, when?  What if it doesn't?  What then?  

The Ride of Life

I've been known to tell a few close to me "Don't borrow trouble" when they've contemplated similar questions about their next step.  And I suppose I am telling it to myself.  I certainly don't have anything more than the day that's right here with me at this moment.  Tomorrow never really comes.  It's always "today" that I'm given.  Why fret about something that isn't there?  (Something I needed to learn as a 5 year old when my sisters told me a ghost lived under our stairs.)

But platitudes are only best when given to others…at least in my mind.  When I offer them to myself I am at minimum, cynical and at most…well, still cynical.  Magnets, memes, quotes and renditions of "Just what makes that little ol' ant…" ring hollow when the soul aches.

So what do I do on a Monday that has started less than exuberant?  I fill my mind with Truth.  Truth must be the fuel that propels me and the filter that guides me each day.  When I allow my emotions or wild imaginations to lead, I will only feel discontent…lacking…empty.  Why?  Most of the time I would say it's because I'm not thinking from Truth.  I'm processing life through my filter of "perceived truth" or "projected truth" or "assumed truth" which really isn't Truth at all. I fill in the blanks for unknown things in my life and the lives of others with fictitious "facts" simply because I long for resolution to my worries, my doubts, my fears, my nosiness. 

Worry says:  Prepare for the worst, then you won't be caught off guard.

Truth says:  Don’t fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God’s wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life. (Ph. 4:6-7)

Doubt says: I'm not sure God will come through.  I had better intervene.

Truth says: God is a safe place to hide, ready to help when we need him. We stand fearless at the cliff-edge of doom, courageous in seastorm and earthquake, Before the rush and roar of oceans, the tremors that shift mountains. Jacob-wrestling God fights for us, God-of-Angel-Armies protects us. (Psalm 46:1-3)

Fear says: I can't control the outcome, so I'll insert my opinion and influence every chance I get.

Truth says: I pray to God—my life a prayer—and wait for what he’ll say and do. My life’s on the line before God, my Lord, waiting and watching till morning, waiting and watching till morning. (Psalm 130:5)

Hmmmm…waiting and watching till morning.  Do you suppose that includes Mondays?

Dome inside the Coptic Orthodox Church

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Today's BOGO Blog:  More Market Mayhem

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